#1916 Firehouse (1987)

The Police Academy series was upon its release heavily bashed by critics for being crude, low brow humour. But stinkers like Firehouse show how skilfully crafted that humour and a roster of characters really is in comparison with this kind of garbage, put together with absolutely no ambition nor skills.

Basically a Police Academy but with fire brigade, Firehouse shows a badly conducting firemen getting a new roster of female fire fighters, with whom they then compete with. But this is no female power movie, more like a sorry excuse to display an infinite amount of mammaries on the screen.

Pretty much nothing in Firehouse makes one laugh, feel nor think, making it one of the most futile attempts in humour for a long time..

80s-o-meter: 81%

Total: 6%

#1914 Penn & Teller Get Killed (1989)

In the early 90s someone in the Finnish National Broadcasting company had the good taste to get the Penn & Teller special Don’t Try This at Home to the programming. It was completely new, something fresh, daring and funny. And I was hooked, becoming an instant fan.

So yes, of course I’ve seen Penn & Teller Get Killed. But for some reason I always thought it as an early 90s release.

Written by the Penn & Teller themselves, the movie looks very much like them. There are tricks, pranks, revealing hoaxes, something of a plot and lots of black humour. In fact, the whole premise of the movie is based on the black humour as Penn jokingly states in national television how he wished someone was trying to kill them – something that soon becomes a self granting wish.

The movie might have been better if given to hands of a professional writer, but would not likely have reflected the duo as well as this one. Same goes for the melodramatic ending, filled with that pitch dark dark humour we’ve come to expect from these two magicians.

80s-o-meter: 91%

Total: 80%

#1909 Enemies, A Love Story (1989)

Enemies, A Love Story is a rollercoaster of emotions in the life of Herman (Ron Silver), a holocaust survivor in the 1949 New York.

You see, Herman has tangled himself between women. And to make things worse, the third woman from the past is just around ther corner.

Silver does well in the role, portraying the low-key Herman with tons of mixed emotions storming below his calm facade. He never sells the character as heroic or likeable, but manages to make him relatable enough so that the audience finds themselves rooting for him, despite his morally questionable choices and actions.

80s-o-meter: 3%

Total: 67%

#1907 Lobster Man from Mars (1989)

A spoof of 1950s monster scifi movies, Lobster Man from Mars was to my surprise a positive little comedy.

The movie successfully picks a few archetypes of the genre and parodises them with either expected or unexpected twist so almost everything you’d expect to find in the movie is there. The amateurish look and feel naturally goes with the picture, and the movie is often much more cheap and TV-series like than it needs to be to convey the message, but for once this did not take too much away from the overall experience.

80s-o-meter: 12%

Total: 70%

#1906 Beach Balls (1988)

When you see a movie cover like this with a silly stupid name, it’s going to be one painful experience or a positive surprise. Either way, the expectations can’t be sky high.

Luckily Beach Balls happens to fall into the latter category. It keeps the annoyances of the genre – like being just a stupid sex comedy only revolving around gratuitous nudity – to the minimum, but still manages to being a showcase of all the possible comedy elements and characters of the genre and era stuffed into one movie: beach, jocks, baddies, heavy metal bands, house parties, side kick of a best friend, clashes with the police and conservative religious parents – it’s all here! The archetype characters also mostly work, one of the best ones being Raf Mauro as the neurotic and problematic parole officer Mr. Sugarman, at the very brink of a complete meltdown.

The humour might be hit and miss but overall Beach Balls is an enjoyable and recommendable time capsule to the silly, fluffy beach comedies of the era.

80s-o-meter: 95%

Total: 83%

#1901 Brenda Starr (1989)

I should have loved Brenda Starr a lot more: a fantasy adventure based on a comic strip taking place in distant, exotic places. But I didn’t.

Reason is, the movie makes a bad case of telling its story, all the way from the comic book artist getting sucked into the world of comics he created, as well as most of the events that follow. There’s baddies and chases and piranhas and all that but nothing that really grasps the viewer. There are a few funny moments of poking fun of the artificial cartoon world, so maybe they should’ve doubled down on this in the first place. To my understanding Brenda Starr not also not a known figure in Europe and is definitely not one in 2024, so this might have hindered my experience also.

Visually the movie is just about perfect, and grasps the sense of adventure well, and the period picture like South American scenes took me back to adventure games like Flight of the Amazon Queen. Brooke Shields and her clothing and mannerisms and stunning dreamy looks fit the role perfectly.

80s-o-meter: 3%

Total: 42%

#1897 What’s Up, Hideous Sun Demon aka Revenge of the Sun Demon (1989)

What’s Up, Hideous Sun Demon is a 1989 redubbed spoof of the 1958 horror/scifi B-movie Hideous Sun Demon. The idea to even produce something like this and then sell it is downright ridiculous, and something you could barely pass in Youtube these days, but surprisingly What’s Up, Hideous Sun Demon does has its moments, and some of the lines are actually quite funny.

And some are not.

Despite the stupidity the movie was easy to watch through, and whet my appetite to see the original one in an unspoiled form some time in the future.

80s-o-meter: 3%

Total: 31%

#1896 New York Stories (1989)

An anthology film, New York Stories weaves together three distinct tales taking part in New York. The movie begins with Martin Scorsese’s Life Lessons where Nick Nolte portrays a painter balancing between his love interest, and upcoming art exhibition. Next up, Francis Ford Coppola takes us into a whimsical world with Life Without Zoë co-written with his daughter Sofia Coppola, depicting a rich kid living independent live of her own while her family is travelling and working, and getting caught up in a story of Arab Princesses and lost jewelries. Lastly, Woody Allen finishes with Oedipus Wrecks, a quirky story of a middle age man being tormented by his possessive and overbearing mother.

Anthology films with different creative force behind each segment are harder to rate. I was the most happiest with seeing Nick Nolte portraying such a different role (and succeeding in it with flying colors), with Life Without Zoë seemingly written for completely different audience and age group.

Finally, Oedipus Wrecks has an interesting setup, but relies on a gag that was funny at first, but both grows old and takes disappointing dramatic turns that ultimately make it the weakest (or, single use) short story of the bunch.

80s-o-meter: 82%

Total: 65%

#1895 Slapstick Of Another Kind (1982)

After suffering through Jerry Lewis’ Smorgasbord aka Cracking Up recently I was even less looking forward to seeing another one.

But Slapstick Of Another Kind was luckily quite different, not relying on short gags and Lewis’ silliness. But it does rely on trying to deliver Kurt Vonnegut’s original novel Slapstick from 1976, which is probably as difficult as a novel can get to adapt to the silver screen, and was also met with mixed opinions by the readers and critics alike. With this in mind it was a bold move trying to pull this one off.

Unfortunately it just does not work at all. The story including Chinese in with shrinking rays in flying saucers and deformed twins from outer space born on earth feels just plain silly, without any intelligent message or subtext behind it. Still better than Cracking Up – but that’s not saying much.

80s-o-meter: 42%

Total: 12%

#1894 Nobody’s Perfect (1989)

Ever since Chaplin and the dawn of the cinema men dressing as women has been an often visited theme to create comedic situations. This is where Nobody’s Perfect taps as well, this time with the motive of college freshman disguising himself as the opposite sex in order to be closer to his crush.

As imagined, nothing of much depth is to be found here, so it just all down to how entertaining the movie manages to be. And in the case of Nobody’s Perfect it actually fares quite well.

The story proceeds in a predictable path, but the whole experience is quite likeable, and definitely fits the bill if you’ve subscribed to having something easy to watch through and young Chad Lowe in the lead role does a perfectly passable job here.

80s-o-meter: 89%

Total: 72%

#1893 Hannah and Her Sisters (1986)

A movie that I have earlier managed to mix up with Crimes of the Heart (likely due to somewhat similar posters), Hannah and Her Sisters is a routine work from Woody Allen.

Even so that I found myself drifting off multiple times when watching it. Allen plays his trademark neurotic self, and other cast is populated by the typical cultivated, cultured and self-interested New Yorker types. The main storyline is about the toned back husband played by Michael Caine having a crush on the sister of his wife, and struggling with his thoughts, and this part of the movie is interesting to some extend. The other storylines, not so much.

For me personally seeing Caine here was the high point of the movie, with everything else falling to the generic Woody land. Allen has done better, both before and afterwards.

80s-o-meter: 70%

Total: 42%

#1886 For Keeps? aka Maybe Baby (1988)

Two high school seniors get pregnant, decide on keeping the baby in For Keeps?, a drama movie riding heavily on clichés and predictable plot lines.

While the struggle that takes place as they have to both give up their youth, dreams and ultimately love for each other is likely what would happen to many, I kept on hoping the movie to take another, less wandered path.

Molly Ringwald was on top of Hollywood’s A-list at the time, and she is once again great (as in: sincere and believable) in her role, no doubt about it. She’s so good that For Keeps? ultimately feels just too small and insignificant for her.

80s-o-meter: 85%

Total: 51%

#1882 Staying Together (1989)

In a small southern town a father of three brothers sells the family chicken restaurant, consequently triggering a chain of changes in the lives his sons.

Staying Together is built upon numerous conflicts, of which few feel relatable and many less so. This also goes with many of the intentions either the writer or the director had for the story or the main characters; Staying Together is a movie busy being dramatic, but more often than not that drama fails strike the right chord with the viewer.

Between the brothers the movie does have its moments – but much of the sentiment, feeling and intentions that might have been there in the storyboard quite unfortunately remain unfulfilled and unmet.

80s-o-meter: 50%

Total: 48%

#1881 Teen Vamp (1989)

An unpopular nerd turns into a cool cat leather-jacketed vampire after getting bit by a vampire prostitute in a shoelace budgeted horror comedy Teen Vamp.

This one’s is a feeble, amateurish attempt if I ever saw one. Some of the similar hobby horror movies manage to turn the underdog setting to their advantage either by being over the top in either the concept or the gore, but Teen Vamp remains amazingly tame until the very end.

Teen Vamp is one of those amateur movies where I bet the the team enjoyed shooting it more than the viewers enjoy watching it.

80s-o-meter: 60%

Total: 17%

#1880 Beverly Hills Brats (1989)

Right off the bat: is Beverly Hills Brats a good movie?

Well, it could be if you are 6-9 years old, but for myself I cannot really say. The movie is rated as PG-13 most likely due to some foul language, but really feels like targeted to kids. It is kind of a shame since the necessarily building blocks for a satire of filthy rich Beverly Hills family seems to be present, but put together in a very dull and predictable way. Again, as the movie was made for infants in mind.

Martin Sheen as the cosmetic surgeon does his best to keep the movie alive, while Peter Billingsley performs his trademark role straight out of Christmas Story. Probably the funniest side of the movie is seeing totally indifferent Burt Young sleepwalk through the entire movie.

80s-o-meter: 90%

Total: 38%

#1875 Spiker (1986)

If this was 80s, Spiker had been as massive success and I was the editor of Mad Magazine, I would have mischievously named the parody a ”Stinker”. But, in this reality it’s 2024, and nobody in this world has ever heard of Spiker.

I have to give it Spiker that at least it is a bit different than your basic sports movie. But in this case it means it’s bit of a mess of elements from beach comedies, weird plots of the team travelling around the globe, trying to make it the national Olympic team and helping people behind the iron curtain. And then some stock footage of real USA volleyball team competing.

And then it suddenly ends.

80s-o-meter: 72%

Total: 28%

#1873 Moonstruck (1987)

I usually don’t force the family into watching the 80s movies – this is purely my personal project – but as they wished something lighthearted for the Saturday night and Moonstruck was available on Prime I decided to go with it as I hadn’t yet seen the movie myself.

And how wrong could it go? After all the movie stars Cher, Danny Aiello, Olympia Dukakis and Nicolas Cage, and was nominated to six academy awards, winning in three, bagging her first Oscar. But, we all found the movie to be a bit of a bore. Everyone seems to be quite tired in what they do and the pace of life is tediously slow. Not only does the love affair between Cher and Cage feel contrived, but so it the former relationship with Danny Aiello’s character, as is how Aiello handles the climatic twist at the end. Artificiality aside, there’s only one small romance – that of the mother – that evokes any emotions.

Also the humour did not really find its target (although the setup could have lent itself to many delicious comedy situations), and the best laughs you can get out of this movie is Aiello forgetting his suitcases for three times in a row.

80s-o-meter: 85%

Total: 41%

#1872 Full Moon in Blue Water (1988)

I love it when a movie gets the mood right. Love it to bits.

Such is the case with Full Moon in Blue Water, a small drama comedy taking place in Texas Gulf Coast on a small, worn out Diner bar run by Floyd (Gene Hackman). Floyd has lost his wife and the will to go on with his life, and remains unwelcoming to Louise (Teri Garr), who sees something in this stubborn old man. Seeings these two clash before coming together would have been more than enough in the right hands to create a solid romantic comedy, but for some reason the writer Bill Bozzone insists on adding unrelated twists to the story in the form of a dim-witted janitor two messes up bad, and then messes up even worse trying to cover the mess.

Even with the apparent problems with the writing, Full Moon in Blue Water is a movie that invites one the share a moment with the people at the Blue Water Grill. And that moment felt too brief, as I could have hanged around just a little bit longer.

80s-o-meter: 87%

Total: 77%

#1871 Another Chance (1988)

A womaniser has everything, wants more, and ultimately loses everything in a fly weight comedy Another Chance.

On top of being quite easy to watch, the movie portrays it main character as a soap opera star, whose life (and the whole movie) becomes a soap opera of sorts. The plot includes one too many dream sequences, but other than that Another Chance is not a bad way to spend 90 (brainless) minutes with.

80s-o-meter: 87

Total: 65%

#1870 Tricks of the Trade (1988)

I had consciously decided to exclude made-for-TV movies from my reviews (partly because many of them lack posters), but this one inadvertently escaped my notice—and, surprisingly, I was quite content that it did.

Tricks of the Trade stands out as one of the superior made-for-TV movies, where the constraints of a limited budget aren’t glaringly obvious, presenting a film that holds its own among B-list ’80s comedies. The narrative also has compelling elements: a seemingly perfect Beverly Hills marriage comes to a shocking end when the husband is murdered while visiting his secret prostitute girlfriend. Now facing danger, the unlikely duo joins forces to unravel the mystery.

The plot cleverly twists the classic cop movie trope, pairing two vastly different characters forced to tolerate each other and collaborate to outsmart the villains. For the most part, this dynamic is effective. However, there was potential for this to be developed into a theatrical release with somewhat sharper writing and I felt the writers didn’t fully exploit the comedic opportunities presented by the contrasting backgrounds of the two leads. As a result, the humour only hit the mark half of the time for me.

80s-o-meter: 90%

Total: 75%